Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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