the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize