Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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