Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
