I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
you win again, gameday.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize