But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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