I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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