Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize