3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
