Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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