At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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