i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
