I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
