We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize