So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Randomize
