Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize
