What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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