Screwed.edu
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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