paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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