We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
oh god was she eating orange peels again
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
