God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
