I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
