I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
