@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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