:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So I just went to clothing optional bar
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize