How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
