So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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