so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
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