he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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