So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Randomize
