I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
