Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Randomize
