When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
