im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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