We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Fuck appropriateness.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
