I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
