operation harelip BJ is a go
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
