Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
