i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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