she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
