so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
