Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
