I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
