windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize