I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
