Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
