after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
last night I used snow as a chaser
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
