i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
