and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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