I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
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