I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
